Many married couples who are having difficulty conceiving a child often resort to scheduling sex in order to make sure pregnancy occurs at the right time. The purpose of this becomes solely to procreate, rather than for pleasure. This can often lead to sex becoming boring and unsexy, feeling more like a chore than an act of intimacy.
Trying to conceive can be frustrating, especially if you’ve been trying for a while without success. Here are five pieces of advice to help you relax and enjoy sex again, even if conception doesn’t happen right away.
Tip 1- timing is everything
The best time to get pregnant is always around 14 days before your next period is due to start. Or more precisely, the menstruation will start 12 to 14 days after ovulation has started. In theory, this is the best timing to get pregnant, provided a sperm is successfully united with the egg in the uterus.
The other two ways of pinpointing certain times in a month when chances of pregnancy are highest are by monitoring of the ovulation cycle via an ovulation predictor kit (OPK) and spotting the bodily symptoms of ovulation.
The ovulation predictor kit is an at-home test that can be purchased from your local pharmacy to help you detect the rise of luteinizing hormone (LH) in your urine, which normally occurs just before ovulation. The only downside to this method is that some women, especially those approaching menopause, have naturally high levels of LH, which can make the test less accurate.
A. basal body temperature dipping slightly before ovulation, then rising again soon after
B. cervical mucus becoming more slippery, stretchy, and transparent as ovulation begins
C. mittelschmerz – one-sided, lower abdominal pain that occurs when an egg is released from the ovaries
Tip 2 – schedule your sexual intercourse
The best way to increase your chances of getting pregnant is to have sex on the day of ovulation and the five days leading up to it. While this may sound unromantic, planning ahead can actually make the experience more intimate.
Add some spice to your week by engaging in verbal and physical foreplay, sex body oil massages, listening to light music, or mild erotic play (if you’re comfortable with it).
Tip 3 – try out different postures
There is no hard medical evidence to suggest that the man-on-top is considered to be universally the best position for the sperms to flow into the cervix, although it is okay to experience different positions as long as the semen remains in the vagina after ejaculation. The only sensible thing for the woman to do is to lie down on her back and raise her legs for a while immediately after sex.
Tip 4 – never do these things
There are three things that couples often overlook when trying to conceive:
A. After sex, the woman should avoid laughing. Laughing involves tensing muscles, which can force semen out of the vagina and lower the chances of conception.
B. Don’t make sex a stressful chore by putting pressure on both the man and woman. Try to keep it natural and romantic. It shouldn’t be like sitting for a SAT or an exam!
Tip 5 – do it every day or alternate days
The best way to increase your chances of getting pregnant is by having sex every day (or every other day) starting from the end of your period. This is because sperm can survive in a woman’s body for up to 5 or 6 days. So this method would give you a good chance to get pregnant. Some doctors say that having sex every day would mean the sperms produced would not be sufficient for a successful fertilization. The other school of thought is having sex every other day would give enough time for the sperm count to build up.
It can be frustrating to feel like you’re failing, especially when you’ve tried so many different methods. My best advice would be to read through the above pointers carefully and keep trying. I’m confident that one day you’ll find success.